Orange is quickly becoming my favorite color.

Each day I take a variety of different medicines to manage the symptoms and side effects that come along with chemo. Although the chemo is killing the cancerous cells that are in my body, it’s killing a lot of other things too. One of the first things that comes to everyone’s mind is the rapidily dividing hair follicles. You lose your hair on your head, which as you all know as that started to fall out by the handful, we took control and my husband and boys shaved it for me. It made it so much less painful, and it was one less thing my cancer was going to take from me. I also lost my leg hair, arm pit hair, you know where hair,(which means no painful waxing for me!) nose hair (which actually kind of sucks because my nose runs constantly with those hairs) and as of recently I’ve really been losing my eye lashes and brows. It seems that most people thing with Pretty Pink Ribbon Breast Cancer that’s what you get. I’ve been told by many people “don’t worry, it’s just hair, you’ll grow it back! It could be worse” I smile politely and walk away. It IS worse! Chemo also kills and breaks down your mouth and you develope beyond painful mouth sores, you lose your sense of taste, you develope painful sores in your nose, burns, rashes, and sores all over your skin, inability to sleep from pain, fear, emotions, or steroids,my vision goes out the window, my eyes get infections, my intestines are stripped out and very painful, I am in an intense amount of cramping pain, and extreme diahhrea, and lastly, it takes away every single lay one of energy I have each day. The GI effects alone are hard to put into words really. The mornings are tough. I usually wake to my bodies own alarm clock being the intense pain in my bowels. I jump out of bed nauseas, both from the pain, and the chemo in general and dart to the down stairs bathroom.(I know it’s silly, but I still try not to poop anywhere near my husband πŸ˜‰ ) I spend quiet some time in the restroom with very intense cramping and diahhrea. At one point last cycle, I had got up 20 times in between 10pm and 4 am. I had taken 16 Imodium, and 4 lomotil with no relief. I was beyond exhausted, dehydrated, and in so much pain. These particular side effects happen every round. Before I eat any meal, I take Imodium and lomotil to try to make my experience a little less miserable. I can typically make it through a meal and talk for 10 mins before the cramping starts and I need the restroom. That’s enough about poop πŸ˜‰ On to my point. There are very real painful day to day side effects and symptoms from my Pretty Pink Cancer that most people don’t really know about. Thankfully, we have some really great medicines available to help manage the symptoms the best we can! That bothers me. It burns my heart and twists my soul when people have not the slightest idea what I go through on a daily basis for the simple fact they truly have the idea in their heads that The hardest thing that a breast cancer diagnosis brings to a woman is hair loss. I want you to know the hard, the scary, the truth. Breast Cancer isn’t pretty, and it isn’t easy. But, I can do it, and so can you. Each day brings new challenges, and not all days are bad. One of my closest friends reminds me daily that there are silver linings in each day, and she is so very right. No, I would not sign up for a Breast Cancer Diagnosis, but, I do know with every fiber of my being that the good that I am getting from this is irreplaceable. I have become a stronger woman than I could have every imagined I could be. I have been heart broken when losing friends or realizing the friends I thought I had I don’t, but for that I am grateful. The few who stand by me, through it all is more than I can dream of. I don’t take anything for granted, I’m slow to anger, quick to forgive, and have become quiet good at finding the positive and good in everything. Like I’ve been told by those who have held my hand trough this, laughed with me, been brutally honest, and continue to pick me up each time I fall, each day is a blessing, live each day to the fullest, because everyday counts. πŸ‘ŠπŸΌπŸ’ͺπŸ»πŸ’— 


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